R-Truth pins Rey Mysterio
Face full of stuff! Face full of stuff! Credit: WWE

8:38 PM EST- The Honky Tonk Man is going into the WWE Hall of Fame. That’s cool. Wait, what? How the fuck is he not already in?!?!?!

8:45 PM EST- R-Truth talking about John Cena as his hero is hilarious. Why hasn’t Truth been on TV lately? That dude is gold.

8:47 PM EST- Seriously though, Rikishi is in the Hall of Fame and Honky Tonk isn’t?

8:50 PM EST- Ok, there is no way Truth is walking out of this triple threat match with Andrade and Rey Mysterio with the title. No fucking way.

8:51 PM EST-  Ok. Shit. I would like to retract my statement. Truth just pinned Mysterio. I repeat, R-Truth just pinned Rey F’N Mysterio. What the hell is happening right now!

8:56 PM EST- Alright, bright idea time: I think I know how to fix Monday Night Raw. Make the show three hours of Zelina Vega doing her taxes or some shit.

9:06 PM EST- Aleister Black represents the dark side of society but he also stands up for the misfits? That makes no fucking sense. You know who Black was in NXT? He was a shit kicking Dutch Murder Machine. I can’t believe it but they are really going to ruin him, aren’t they? I should have seen this coming. We all know the Vince hates the Blacks…. *chuckle*

9:16 PM EST- People have been complaining about this Shinsuke Nakamura and Rusev thing. Doesn’t matter if you like it, this is probably the best spot for both of them at the moment. I don’t get why Black and Ricochet are still being put together but whatever. At least they are on National TV.

9:20 PM EST- Rusev calling Black a “rookie’ is hysterical.

9:21 PM EST- Isn’t Ricochet’s knee supposed to be hurt? So much for all that work Rusev and Nakamura did on Ricochet’s leg, huh?

9:25 PM EST- AJ Styles hair ridiculous. I’m not mad. Maybe he’s born with it.

AJ Styles
Maybe it’s Maybelline!

9:28 PM EST- Oh look. It’s Lacey EvanssssssZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

9:37 PM EST- Kingston, Woods, and Big E. look like someone shot their dog. I know this is all bull, but how can you not feel bad… for the next WWE Champion? Yeah, I am booking it now. There is no way Kingston doesn’t win the WWE Championship now, for better or worse.

Twelve seconds later

9:37.5 PM EST- They are going to mess this up. ARGH. I know they are. I need you all to give me some hope this Kingston thing isn’t just going to go away. Give me some examples of times they didn’t just blow a guy’s natural momentum. Let us know in the comments, or yell at me on Twitter @AboveAverageLLP or via the @BlaqueRabbitcom.

9:40 PM EST- I missed Kevin Owens. I didn’t realize how much until tonight. It blows he is on Smackdown though. Raw needs Owens bad. Also, I need to hit the bowling alley because all that bowling has Owens looking tight… like a tiger.

9:45 PM EST- The commentary has been horrid tonight. Between learning about how dark and brooding Aleister Black (instead of showing us) and the commentary team is going on and on about Kingston’s professionalism. This is fucking strange. I am waiting for Saxton or Graves to blurt out that Kingston is also a credit to his race. Totally cringeworthy.

9:50 PM EST- Bryan should bring back the, “I’ve got till five!” thing he used to do with the refs when he was holding a nasty submission hold or just pounding on his opponet.

9:52 PM EST- Bryan just hit a nasty looking superplex on Kingston. I shudder every time Bryan lands on his head. This shit is scary. We get it. You think you are freaking Wolverine, but you aren’t protecting yourself, dum-dum!

9:54 PM EST-  Rowan just let Kingston eat the mat on the outside. It wasn’t Taka Michinoku nearly dying at the Royal Rumble bad, but it was pretty goddamn bad.

Taka Michinoku Dies at the Rumble
“… He’s Dead…”

I’m am no wrestler, but I am pretty sure you are supposed to catch dudes when they dive out of the ring like that. Kingston’s children probably felt that bump.

9:59 PM EST- Owens just beat the champ with a Stone Cold Stunner. Brilliant! That must be Owen’s new finish. Lord knows he needed one. The pop-up powerbomb is a shit finisher unless you are Sid or the Big Show or some shit.

This week’s episode of Smackdown Live was far from perfect, but it was still more entertaining than Raw. I have no idea what the hell any of what happens means or if any of it will stick, but I’ll be here next week complaining about how stupid it all was!

10:07 PM EST- I left the TV on and there are a bunch of idiots on my TV on an island. Who watches this crap?

One hour Later

11:00 PM EST- OMG, I can’t believe Kady actually got in the bed with that dude. When John sees the footage on the other side of the island he is going to be crushed. How can she treat such a nice guy like that? He has tried so hard to stay faithful to her. That bitch……… wait, shit. wrong diary.

 

Follow me on Twitter @AboveAverageLLP!

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